A forced update

Does your internet use go through phases like mine? Sometimes I can’t account for the time I loose online and I gladly share all the minutia of my daily life; other times, just checking my email and usual internet haunts is like a chore.

Lately I just haven’t felt like writing, and like anything, the farther behind you get, the more daunting the task of catching up becomes. So here’s just a quick update until I get my groove back (which I have no doubt at all, will happen very soon…)

Last Thursday I was scheduled to audition for a comedic webisode series. Webisodes are really popular right now; you never know when they’re going to hit big, but if they pay, it’s nominal. Thank goodness I had a link to their previous work before I wasted my time auditioning. With the recent Jamie Pressley/ Poison Ivy 3 example in mind, I know you have to start somewhere, but this isn’t it. Check it out here. I can see why some might think these scenes are funny, but the previous female roles have been degrading. It's very one-sided, but what do you expect considering their weekly podcast is called the "Dude Zone?" I'm not judging what they do, but it's just not for me... Plus I'm sure they'd say my breasts were too small! I've previously declined two or three auditions, via email, after reading the script or learning more about the project. It always makes me crazy and I fear I'm turning down a great opportunity, but I ultimately have to go with my gut. In this case, all I had was a phone contact, which is kind of a problem for me...

No matter what you think of the project, it’s really important not to be a no-show. When I first moved here, an old college friend who’s lived here about 4 years and recently started his own production company advised me to fake my representation until I got an actual agent and manager. He said to either do it myself or have my boyfriend do it. He says many actors do that in order to get more respect and better deals. I fear it would have the opposite effect if casting were to realize your agent or manager were not legitimate, and thus haven’t had the balls or extra cell number to do it. In this case though, my combined phonephobia and inability to say no led to the founding of Glass City Management – that’s right, my boyfriend called them to say I had become unavailable.

The ironic part is that literally two minutes after my boyfriend made that call for me, my agent called me with an audition – the agent I don’t like, who had only sent me on one awful audition in three months. I reluctantly returned their call and skeptically listened to the details… “You speak Spanish, right?” “NO.”

An hour later I found myself in a crowded casting office with a Little Caesar’s cap on my head saying, “Cinco dólares por favor!” They had been auditioning all afternoon and I was #120, but that included the leads of the commercial, “stressed out mom” and “giggling kids,” in addition to the role I was auditioning for, “pizza girl.”

The waiting area was congested, especially since it was shared with another casting call that was nothing but kids and the check-in lady was understandably bitchy. I amused myself by observing a stage mom prep her ten year old son. He insisted he didn’t know Spanish. She insisted he could read for both Spanish and English (which I did as well). She muttered, “This isn’t what I expected… this is a cattle call!” He complained, “I should have brought my Game Boy.”

After thirty-five minutes of waiting, first to check in and then to go into the actual audition room, I spent a few minutes saying “Cinco dólares por favor!” twice and “That’ll be five dollars please” four times to a camera and two gentlemen. And that was that. I returned the Little Caesar’s cap to the bitchy lady and got the hell out of there, away from all the children and to the Starbucks down the block as fast as possible. I’m told, though, that in comparison to theatrical auditions in NYC, forty minutes is amazingly efficient.

I did my thing and left with no expectations, thus I was surprised to find out yesterday that I have a callback for the role this morning!

What the hell? This was supposed to be brief! Brevity is just not my writing style, which is why I haven’t felt like writing lately because I haven’t had the time or energy for it to turn into this!

Anyway… to QUICKLY conclude…

I never heard back from PBS, which sucks, but I’ve been plugging along and a few other positive things have come up.

Friday I had an audition for a short film. I’m sure I won’t get the part, but it was a cool experience.

Saturday evening I went out to dinner in Beverly Hills for character research and development with my acting class scene partner. The Beverly Hills experience was wonderful, but nothing like I expected. The meal was affordable and after the fancy stores close and tourist leave it’s a stunning and safe place for a pleasant evening stroll.

Monday I had my usual acting class, which is really a cold read workshop with different casting directors each week. The point is to get your picture and resume in their hands and show them what you’re all about. Lately it hasn’t seemed like I’m on the same page with the teacher of the class and having seen close to a dozen casting directors, nothing had happened yet… BUT, yesterday I got an email from Monday night’s guest requesting that I find her latest independent film project on Actors Access and submit for an audition! FINALLY!

Tuesday I auditioned to be a contestant on GSN’s Bingo America! Funny, I know! I decided it won’t hurt my acting career and could help my bank account, so why the hell not?! More about that later…

Also Tuesday I attended the first free acting class offered by Universal to its Tour Guides. I’m so excited because this is really an “acting class,” as opposed to a casting director workshop, meaning it teaches and works to develop a specific acting technique. Not all the guides are keen on the specific technique being taught, that of Stella Adler which is strongly influenced by Stanislavski’s “Method,” but I think there’s always something to be gained even if you don’t agree with the entire concept.

And with that not-so-brief update, I need to try to get some beauty sleep so later this morning I can be the best damn pizza girl ever to grace a cheesy (no pun intended) Little Caesar's commercial!

(Stop laughing, it’s a paying gig!)