Monday, January 19, 2009


As I sit here on my sofa, I feel like the gravity of the universe is pushing me down; a laundry list of things to do is swirling around my head, but I can't move: box up your college binders, go fill the bird feeders, grab one last coffee with so-and-so, make supper and take it to your guy who's at work till 9 p.m., clean out the loaner car and worst of all... go pack your suitcase.

My original departure date was the 6th; as soon as New Years hit I became very aware of it and extremely emotional. We moved it to the 20th, tomorrow, and thankfully I've been able to enjoy the past two weeks. "The 20th" did not loom ominously like the 6th had, but now that it's here I literally feel like I'm going to vomit. The idea of getting on a plane tomorrow afternoon seems bizarre and absurd, as if the life I'd led from last April to November was just a dream.

In the interest of thinking positive, the submission site I belong to has been sending me several emails a day with projects that match my profile, so it looks like there will be a lot of things to submit for, from which I'll hopefully be busy with auditions. I've also promised myself I'm going to be less of a hermit. I know three fellow Ohio women out there that I never met with in my first seven months, not to mention some other distant family, old acquaintances and new friends that I hadn't made the effort to reach out to like I should have.

On the other hand, my presence here would be more helpful now, in terms of selling the house. There was only one house showing in December, but already three in the past two weeks. I know my partner can keep the house neat and clean, since he's never here to mess it up, but removing the animals is a huge pain in the ass for him. The uncertainty of this coming year causes me a headache at its very mention; there's no way to know when the house will sell or what kind of project I'll land.

In the industry I've chosen I can never think anything is stable, nor can I write anything off - two days ago I got the same message from QVC, again asking where I was located. I don't know if they misfiled or simply never received my first reply, but I again sited dual residency and expressed my interest.

So, that's the latest. I suppose once I'm back in LA I'll have more to blog about here again and I'll try not to be such a downer all the time.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

FYI I do check here everyday.